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Old 04-04-2012, 07:45 PM
Fiona Fiona is offline
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 57
Default Having trouble adjusting to husband's new girlfriend

Just what it sounds like. In the past, I've had my own insecurities about people my husband has dated, but I've recognized them as exactly that and dealt with them accordingly.

This new person just makes me uneasy. She seems like a lot of drama, most of which I won't get into here. There are a few major issues for me, including that they broke one of our fundamental agreements at the beginning of their involvement, they spend most of their time together drinking heavily, she has expressed frustration/impatience if my husband or I contact each other when they're hanging out (it doesn't happen often, but sometimes it can't be avoided) and a few other things that set off alarm bells for me, including that she has never been in a poly relationship before and doesn't seem to have any idea how to handle...well, anything. I am tired of feeling like her poly experiment.

This situation has caused trouble not only in my relationship with my husband, but even in the one between me and my other partner. This makes me feel angry and helpless.

When I try to talk to my husband about this, he gets very defensive and asks if I want him to break up with her. I'm not sure; on one hand, I guess I do. On the other, I don't want to play that card unless I absolutely have to - it doesn't seem like it'll fix anything now. Sigh. But I don't like her, and I don't feel like I can trust her (or my husband) either.

Had a similar experience? Any advice to offer? Thank you in advance.
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