You can both go over your budget and see where costs can be cut. Then each of you can have a "dating fund" out of whatever you might have after your basic expenses. Keep this separate and use for any dates, travel, etc. related to your lovers.
We're in a recession, possibly even a depression, although since most people getting public assistance are getting it electronically, we don't see the "bread lines." It isn't unreasonable nor odd in this economy to need to be frugal.
Also, I gotta say, since I started dating again after my separation, I haven't met very many men who treat for every date. I always wind up going dutch for the most part. It seems to cost me a lot to date anyone as a woman, as well.