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Old 04-03-2012, 09:16 AM
urmila urmila is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: chennai, India
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Smile Hinduism and poly

After our New Year day (Ugadi) which we all celebrated with great joy and enthusiasm, son left for coorg to visit his friend, and from there he will be going back to his college, . Now I have got a little free time to write about the decision we had jointly taken. Before that I want to tell about our religion and our religious background.
As I had already mentioned, we are upper cast Hindus and who are quite religious and ritualistic. According to our religion marriages are for life and there is no provision for divorce, even though now legally it is possible to get a divorce as per the Hindu marriage act, which was passed by our parliament after independence. In our religion, marriage is a sacred relationship, a Devine covenant and a sacrament. Marriage is a part of Hindu dharma, which once accepted, should be upheld by both through out their lives. And cannot be dissolved thro’ divorce. Divorce as a concept is alien to Hinduism
.As for as we going against religious sentiments, I have done quite bit of reading on net and based on that I found that:
The Vedas and the Hindu religion itself do not outlaw polygamy or polyandry, meaning we going poly will not be against our religion
This conclusion was based on the fallowing statements from various researchers
A)women loving and accepting two men as husbands at the same time
"The earliest known proof of polyandry comes from Sumer the Harappan civilization ". According to one researcher "the practice of polyandry, known alike to the gods and men, harks back to the age of the Rig-Veda. The Vedas, the Sutras and the Smritis, the Mahabharata and the Ramayana, the Buddhists texts as well as the Jains, Kautilya and the Kamasutra all attest its existence in early India. And the evidences of literature are reinforced by the later iconography and art and by the presence of polyandrous pockets from Tibet in the north right down to Ceylon in the South". The equivocally of the prevalence of polyandry in India in the past, especially when Draupadi got married, is very clear from earlier writings.
Polyandry has been practiced in India and is still practiced by a minority. The popular Hindu epic, Mahabharatha provides a striking example of polyandry, Draupadi, daughter of king of Panchāla being married to five brothers. Vysasa says that the custom of taking more than one husband has existed in the country since time immemorial. It is therefore historically justifiable

Non-fraternal polyandry exists among the Kota; and among the Karvazhi, Pulaya, Muthuvan, and Mannan in Kerala. In 1911 Census of India, E.A. Gait mentions polyandry of the Tibetans, Bhotias, Kanets of Kulu valley, people of state of Bashahr, Thakkars and Megs of Kashmir, Gonds of Central Provinces, Todas and Kurumbas of Nilgiris, Tolkolans of Malabar, Ishavans, Kaniyans and Kammalans of Cochin, Muduvas of Travancore and of Nairs.

As per the researchers: polyandry may be wiped out in India (but may remain in few cases in some isolated pockets) by the end of 20th century or at the end of first quarter of next century. Thus in future, it will remain only in the books, especially as ethnographic material of the past. But they might be proved wrong of the emerging trend of the skewed gender ratio
But in fact, sex-selective abortion in India and the resultant skewed gender ratio might bring back polyandry as an accepted practice in India

B) My husband and cousin accepting both of us as their wives
Rig-Veda certainly permits polygamy though monogamy may have been the rule
Polygamy was rampantly practiced in ancient Hindu society. An address by Bhishma to King Yudhishthira in the Mahabharata, succinctly endorses this fact: "A Brahmana can take three wives. AKshatriya can take two wives. There was one example of polyandry in the ancient Hindu epic, Mahabharata, Draupadi marries the five Pandava brothers. Regarding polygyny, in Ramayana, father of Ram, King Dasharath has three wives, but Ram has pledged himself just one wife.
The Hindu god, Lord Krishna, the 9th incarnation of the Hindu god Vishnu had many wives at his kingdom in Dwarka. In the post-Vedic periods, polygamy declined in Hinduism, and is now considered immoral,[9] although it is thought that some sections of Hindu society still practice polygyny, in some areas.

Based on all this and with the intention of making our relationship permanent and to obtain a religious sanctity, we have decided on on our next step
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