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Old 04-01-2012, 02:30 PM
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drtalon drtalon is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Raleigh, NC
Posts: 112

Being given an ultimatum sucks.

Originally Posted by OutsiderLookingIn View Post
what are some suggested ways for my wife and I to open up dialogs about things, feelings, and thoughts, without causing any undue stress or anxiety about the impending conversation?
Non-violent communication can help, if you have any experience with the idea. Writing letters to me (or just writing her thoughts out for herself) works best for my current partner when she doesn't have the emotional energy/will/wherewithall for a face-to-face discussion.

Originally Posted by OutsiderLookingIn View Post
After a fight in which he gave her the silent treatment for two days, she agreed to this encounter.

If she can't recognize how unhealthy this behavior is and what a bad situation she's gotten herself into, I'm afraid there's not much you're going to be able to do to help. Sometimes, people need to learn things for themselves, whatever the consequences, because not experiencing the thing(s) would be worse by their measure.

It's possible that saying about "If you love someone, set them free," really means, "Sometimes you have to just watch them make their own horrible mistakes (in your opinion)."

I don't know if there's much you can do except to decide whether and how long you want to work on things and where the lines between love, loyalty, and foolishness lie.
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