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Old 03-31-2012, 02:40 AM
KyleKat KyleKat is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Central Illinois
Posts: 284

Originally Posted by km34 View Post
I've never had things end with a screaming match, but have had some very unwelcome drama because of one ex in particular. Generally if it didn't work out the first time, it won't work out again. Sure, people change, but I would have to see some major difference in any of my exes or hubby's exes to want them in our lives.
I'm glad you haven't. I have and those breakups are awful. Sometimes the non-angry breakups can be worse. Their breakup was because of circumstances of the time, not because of either of them or how they felt towards one another so there is a chance they could work.

Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Hmm, to say ex's are ex's for a reason makes it sound like all ex's should be considered assholes. I've always hated the idea of putting down and criticizing an ex just because a relationship is over, because then it makes me look like just as much of an asshole for being with that person, if they're supposedly so bad!
That's not what I meant. I meant that if there wasn't a reason they wouldn't be an ex. Usually that reason is over something bad but it seems like in your case that's not true. Good for you. I wish I could say the same.

I've never had any relationships end because we were screaming and fighting, nor because the other person was crazy or mean or anything like that. In fact, I've mostly had really nice breakups, even if they were sad, where we just acknowledged that it's not working and wish each other the best. I always strove to be as mature as I could regarding ending a relationship. Then we can remain friends. The most painful breakup was my marriage ending, but I am sure we will be friends again someday. I think most of my relationships prior to my marriage ended because things sort of just fizzled out. Then a year or two or more later, we meet up again and hit it off. So, I guess that's why I never understood this concept of avoiding ex's at all costs, across the board, no matter what. I think, if it feels good and right, go for it!
I hope you can be friends with your husband again. And I agree with you which is why I told her its fine. She was happy I agreed because it was totally something she didn't expect.
"Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is the regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable." - Sydney Smith

Kyle: 27 year old male
Katie (rymmare): 25 year old female
Kids: girl: 5 years old, boy: 3 years old
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