Please remember that everyone is different. Where I would not be able to stay in a relationship where the man I believe has committed to me would make decisions and choices without consulting me and considering how I would fit into a situation or scenario he wishes to have, you might. Really, all of what you have read here is for pondering (which you sound like you are doing). Take what you will. Even if its the chance to see things from a different perspective. We don't know everything because we only know what you have told us and your point of view. That can be very useful. Bottom line is there are many ways to go about creating what you want and need for your future.