Thread: Am I selfish?
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Old 03-28-2012, 06:28 AM
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NovemberRain NovemberRain is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 712

Current bf has always said that he'd like to watch, even before we talked about me having a real OSO. He is very good friends with First bf and he knows that First bf is not the sort of guy who would want (or tolerate) him to watch. So apart a joke in our initial conversation or two, he hasn't said. I suspect he really wouldn't like to watch, but I dunno. *I* wouldn't like it at all, I would feel very inhibited.

That said, I must really live in California. I have yet to tell anyone who really questions it in any way. I haven't told everyone. I've told three really good friends at work, but no one else there. All my actual friends have been very blase about it. Perhaps they're too polite. Even my parents (all three, plus step dad's gf) were encouraging (if surprised).

Sometimes, I let people's questioning be a barometer of how well I know myself. The first time I noticed this was telling a women about remembering my childhood (some trauma). She said, 'oh, I could never see that as trauma' and told me a story from her childhood almost identical, that regarded as lovely. I was very sad for her, and I felt totally validated in the knowledge I had of myself. It was a strange experience, but I remember it now when someone questions something I know to be true about myself.
Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own...
Robert A. Heinlein

Me: female, bi, (formerly hinge of a vee)
with FirstBoyFriend (FBF)(moderately long-distance)
and no longer with CurrentBoyFriend (CBF)(who now lives in a house far away-with stairs I can't climb)
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