Maybe he lost interest because of all the non-sequitors.
He and his wife are new to poly. So let's be kind. He may or may not be pussy whipped. He didn't mention an OPP (one penis policy). His wife is not dating women. She has one steady male lover/fuckbuddy (could be a serious bf, we don't know).
Sounds to me like his wife is caught up in New Relationship Energy (NRE). She doesn't seem to realize having sex with her partner once a week, and her good old hubs rarely getting any sugar is unfair.
But of course it is. Most experienced poly people make sure to attend to the romantic and sexual desires of their primary, or things can get very ugly, as they are here.
I'd recommend he renegotiate for more romance and sex with his wife. Surely she can manage sex once a week with both her husband and her lover? At least?
My gf gets turned on when she knows I have had sex with one of my 2 bfs and I always take care of her sexual cravings for me. It's only fair. Plus, it's great fun for me!
I do have a high libido and manage sex with the gf about 4x a week and once a week with each bf. Just sayin.'
And if the original agreement was that she can date locally and he can only date way out of town... first of all, why? Second of all, if it's not working, renegotiate boundaries around that as well.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
There's no lying in polyamory!
I'm a 58 year old woman with 2 partners:
miss pixi, my live-in gf, 36 (together since Jan '09)
Ginger, bf, 61, married, lives nearby (together since Jan '12)