Jealousy into Compersion?
Husband had his date yesterday afternoon. It went very well. This was with (let's give her a name because it looks like this is going to turn into something) Fawn. They talked for hours, connected really well. She was interested in his life/relationship story. She was open about hers. Which isn't poly and she is single currently but bisexual. Her last partner was a woman. He seemed genuinely happy last night after coming home. Excited, fully of possibilities and confidence. I was full of love and relief that his experience was so positive yet his own. It felt really good.
This is not how I felt much of the time he was on the date. The four hours he wasn't home I felt waves (not huge ones but pangs) of jealousy, self doubt (what the hell am I doing?), and then get a hold of yourself woman this is going to be ok. I know that jealousy is normal, its not to be ashamed of.
Yet, I was surprised by the rush of happy once he walked in the door and was glowing. The jealousy went skittering away and hearing about his date was pleasurable, warm like we were sharing something special. Which we were.
Is this compersion? Does the jealousy still come even though you feel the joy for your partner? I will search this too but just wondering what the current thoughts are.
Love laughs at locksmiths. ~ Proverb