Well, you`re playing the role of the pussy-whipped man.
A role I don't think you initially signed up for, but I hope you see it now.
She is most definitely going to kick and stomp like a child about any complaining you do. You signed on to do things as she pleased, without even negotiating what you wanted. Most likely because you didn`t know what to ask for, or what was possible. Very human mistake to make. Live and learn, right ?
So instead of ASKING PERMISSION for things, and being told what you can and cannot do, relative to what makes her happy,...How about you find a realistic approach on what you want for yourself, your needs, and what feels fair to BOTH parties.
Present her with it as a subject that needs negotiating, not as asking permission for what you want.
If the history you have provided us is true, shit will hit the fan.
As it should.
It`s time to figure out what you are really dealing with. If it`s just a case of a spouse having a greedy time period,...things will blow over, and a mutual agreement, and respect can start.
If this is how it is,...you better find out now so you can make some long-term choices.
The other option is to keep super-calm, super-understanding, and hope that it all sorts itself out. Meanwhile you can read 30 books on compersion, learn to lawn bowl, and waste 3 years of your life driving yourself crazy desiring physical intimacy.