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Old 03-20-2012, 04:03 PM
Chaz Chaz is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 3
Default Envy - sex for him but not for me

As of last November my Wife has taken the first step in our Open Marriage agreement by taking on a lover. The agreement goes something like this:
-She can go out and date and have sex while I stay at home with the kids. This has included a couple of weekend trips with her lover.

-I am only allowed to have sex outside the marriage on business trips, not at home. At this point I have not had any success on that front.
Also around November, we emerged from a difficult time in our marriage, not related to sex. We are in the clear now emotionally and the marriage feels strong. However, we have only had sex twice since then, whereas she has sex with her lover about once a week. I have made it very clear that this bothers me no end. I don't expect a 1:1 kind of thing, but when we get into the 30:1 kind of ratios, it starts seeming awfully unfair.

I understand that after coming out of a difficult time in a marriage can mean that there isn't a lot of sex, but it sure feels like she's getting her sexual needs filled and not bothering to address re-connecting with me.

What drives me crazy is that her lover gets lots of sexual goodies, and I get virtually none, while at the same time I'm barred from filling my needs outside unless i'm out of town on work, where I'm generally busy and not very good at the "pick-up" bar scene anyways.

What does everyone think? Is my envy reasonable?
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