Originally Posted by nycindie
It won't stay like this forever. It may not be ruined, just changed.
I wonder why she feels you can share your body but not your heart. What is the difference for her? I mean, really there isn't any part of our physical beings that doesn't contain our souls and emotions. .
It's an excellent question! When a woman expects her partner to love only her, why in the hell would she participate, and in some cases go so far as to advocate, bringing another woman into their sex life? Does she really believe her partner is not going to develop feelings for the woman after repeatedly sharing the most intimate physical relationship two people can share? WHAT THE FUCK???
She ultimately causes herself and her mate a lot of heartache.
And yes, it's a particular burr under my saddle because I have found myself the secondary in this exact scenario. Sex was fine as long as her husband and I only liked each other. When it developed into love, the shit hit the fan. Silly me, I thought love was the point. (Still fairly recent. I find my emotions evolving from broken-hearted and sad to pissed off.)
Anyway, to the OP, I'm very sorry. I think your wife was totally out of touch if she believed it was possible for you to keep sharing sex with your friend and never develop deep feelings for her. I'm sure if the shoe were on the other foot and the mutual friend were a man, she would find herself in the same boat as you are now ~ with feelings for him.