Originally Posted by Qarzan
I do think all of this stress comes from the fact that H and I didn't clearly define what we had, or what was going to happen. It would have been much easier for me to deal with if we had decided something, anything, instead of saying "Let's take it as it comes" which basically gives me no information.
...I did realize, once I calmed down, that my reaction came from a place of neediness and desperation. I need to cap that s4!t.
By the way you can write the word "shit" here. This site doesn't have any problems with cursing.
Wait a minute -- I just re-read your original post.
You and H. have kissed, had dinner, and one "topless makeout session," as well as having taught a class together. And you are stressed about where it will lead? Wishing that a decision could be made? And you want her to define this with you? Unless things transpired that you didn't share here, you seem to be blowing things way out of proportion. As far as I see it, it is very defined: you two are just starting to date.
I can say, honestly, you might be coming off as very pushy if this is your approach. I wouldn't have sent that apology email. The previous text might not have even been a big deal to her. You need some objectivity and to not be reading so much into this. There is no obligation on her part for any definitions or explanations or decisions simply because you had dinner together and she made out with you once. While, of course, it is very exciting, the two of you are hardly an "item" yet. Ease up on this, date R. and whomever else you are drawn to, and get some perspective on H. or it will backfire!