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Old 03-15-2012, 08:51 PM
Kemie's Avatar
Kemie Kemie is offline
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Milwaukee
Posts: 22
Arrow Anti-Tier Relationship Problems with Mono

So, my mono-boyfriend, Legs, did a wee bit of internet stalking and came upon my intro message here and it upset him. He asked me if I love my poly boyfriend, Wolf, more than him. I said "I don't know. It's different. I love steak and pie..." Does anyone have a better answer to this question?

He disliked being called my secondary relationship. That's fair; he's not really a secondary relationship. But time with him does defer to time with Wolf because my time with Wolf is on a much stronger constraint (I can only see him Saturday nights to Sunday afternoons and we live in different cities.) So you could say I put Wolf first. Legs and I basically live together, although we swap back and forth between my place and his and he rarely sees me on weekends.

He'll probably find this and read it. I considered changing my screenname, but he'll likely hunt it up anyway. This is, as far as I know, unusual behavior from Legs stemming from insecurity in the relationship. It's odd for him to breach my privacy like this. I'll likely be moving out of the city for a new job in the next few months and he's very worried about this.

So my question is: how do I pre-empt this kind of behavior? I feel as if I'm repeating myself every time he gets frusturated and upset. Looking for some help here.

Edit: So Legs just came to me and said he's actually been in love with another girl for the last few months (perhaps mono is not as mono as he thinks.) I'm sad he didn't tell me, although he was pretty obvious about his affections for her. She is now in a new LDR. Monogamous. I have to say... this adds a whole new ballpark.
Me: Mid-Twenties. Bi-sexual, but not bi-emotional. My open poly boyfriend: Wolfwood. My mono-boyfriend: Russo.
My blog; sexually-explicit posts locked under friends-only. Friend to read: Polygoodgirl

Last edited by Kemie; 03-16-2012 at 12:09 AM.
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