I've been having a real hard time at school. Yesterday, on Wed, I was supposed to go spend the night with Cookie and Vanilla was going to be with her beau Pistachio. On Tuesday I realized that on Wed, I would be happy to get home after 11 pm, with so much schoolwork piling up. So I texted to Vanilla and asked if I should go to Cookie's on Thu instead. Vanilla's mum was coming over on Thu, so I thought it would be cool to get out of her way. Vanilla responded that she saw no reason why her mum and I couldn't hang out in the same space, but that she could always ask her mum. I took this, for some reason, as a go ahead-sign.
So, come this morning (Thu). Vanilla climbs to bed with me after her night with Chio and we talk. I say I'm happy she came for a morning cuddle because we are not going to see each other again before tomorrow, Friday. Vanilla says no way she is going to sleep four nights apart, and insists that we specifically agreed that there should be no overnight dates this week, because she is going to her parents' for the weekend. Should I have gone to Cookie's tonight, we would have slept four nights apart (Wed, Thu, Fri, Sat).
I'm upset because I thought we agreed that because of deadlines, I changed my night with Cookie from Wed to Thu, and she's upset because she thinks I've gone against her specific request not to have any overnight dates this week. She was okay with us both spending the night with our respective beaus on Wed, because today we would sleep in the same bed before she goes away. Last night, when I came home instead of going to Cookie's, she assumed I had simply skipped seeing Cookie before her trip because of school. She argued that since me and Cookie were going to have the whole weekend to ourselves anyway, I could postpone gratification on this one. I argued that since Cookie works during the day and I have to work both on Fri night and the whole of Saturday, the whole weekend would mean a few short hours together before she comes home on Sun. I'm extra pissed because I know Cookie and I won't see each other again before my trip with Vanilla next week.
I text to Cookie and cancel our date. He responds that he is upset and disappointed and feels unsafe in a configuration where one person can call off dates between the other two entirely arbitrarily whenever she wants to. I texted back that it was I who was communicating badly and making spur-of-the-moment decisions, and just got off the phone with him where I explained in detail what went down. Vanilla offered to have Cookie over on Mon before our trip, for all of us three to hang out, since she misses him, too.
No major drama, just a minor hiccup, but now we have a reservation system where I mark down my date nights with Cookie to the family planner on the wall in advance and we agreed that I would let Vanilla know before I make any changes to prior plans.
Me: bi female in my twenties