Thanks for the feedback!
Thanks everyone. I really need to just let things be what they are instead of constantly trying to fix them. Bad habit. Fixer-fixer, tsk tsk.
I tried to have someone to come over and spend the evening with me and the kids, but it didn't work. I ended up falling asleep just fine, then had that dream. When I asked my lover what time they went to bed, she said 3:30, about 2.5 hours after his arrival. That means he came home from work and they boned for 2.5 hours. I started feeling super insecure. She reminded me it wasn't a contest, but I just have this awful fear that someone will want out because they'll realize they can get a better lay elsewhere. I know, totally irrational--but it is a fear. Sigh.