Originally Posted by Cleo
There is one issue that further complicates things. Girlfriend only lives in our city part time. The rest of the time she lives quite far away. In her hometown, she has a boyfriend, who doesn't know about her relationship with my husband.
It's not my position to judge this (although I guess I do, just a little), its my husbands decision wether or not he wants this. But. When they went on a trip together, they met a bunch of her friends and were in HER social circle (though the boyfriend wasn't there), and those friends were not allowed to know the nature of the relationship between my husband and her, because she wants to keep this a secret. So they pretended to be 'just friends' for a week.
So this sort of rubs me the wrong way.. its a bit childish maybe but I keep thinking: why should I welcome her with open arms into my life, while she is keeping her relationship with my husband a secret from everyone who is important to her?
Yeah that would bug me too. Cheating isn't ok and I would wonder if she is cheating on someone else if she has the capacity to be cheating on your husband as well. Honesty is important. Has your husband encouraged her to come clean to her boyfriend about their relationship? I wonder if you'd feel more comfortable with her being a part of your social life if everything was out in the open on both sides.