Originally Posted by Ilove2men
I think what I am encountering is a wall I have built to prevent myself from being emotionally vulnerable in such a vulnerable position physically.
Well, that would follow from the abuse. Somebody can take your body but they can't take your mind. Now the task at hand becomes that of leaving that defense mechanism behind.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.