This is all a process. Like learning to drive, or ride a bike. You start off with training wheels, or limitations and ultimately gain confidence and experience. however, sometimes the 'need' for things settles with time, sometimes it is lifelong.
Something to think about, ( when you have differing viewpoints with a partner.) is the potential to not have the same rules set on each other.
He can give you what you need, and you can give him what he needs. The rules don`t necessarily need to be common between you both. If you are on the same page there, then it`s best not to over-think things, or over-plan.
You can possibly think about the fact you want to acknowledge the person, and meet them, but it might go differently then you envision. Instead of 'always beforehand' you might need to make lee-way for it to happen before a date with one girl,..or 3-5 dates in with the next woman.
Outside of dating, we tend to bump into people in organic ways. If he just has the attitude of 'you`ll meet my wife at some point' I don`t see how it is a big deal if you say 'hello' while they are on the computer talking, or on the phone, or even a quick hi when they go for coffee. As long as it is just that, I don`t think it`ll seem like a big deal to anyone after the fact.