Originally Posted by beginninglove
One fantastic development is that Alex did go out on a limb and have her own sexual experience at a play party recently. I think it did a world of good for her to have an experience outside of our relationship and see that different experiences are just that...different. I was really proud of her for being willing to try something that stretched her comfort zone just a bit and she ended up really enjoying it and even finding out about a side of herself (an interest in BDSM) that she is potentially interested in exploring more outside of our relationship. For now she's not really actively pursuing that but as opportunities arise I think she will be more and more willing to explore that without me, and I am encouraging her to do so.
I'm really glad to hear this!
Don't forget that Alex's new interest in BDSM might be something you can explore WITH her, IN your relationship with her, rather than just sending her to seek it elsewhere.
If I had a primary partner, I would want our outside experiences to feed into improving the sexual chemistry between the two of us...especially if there were an initial problem with the sexual connection.
I guess what I mean is, don't get so caught up in K that you forget that Alex might be an extremely sexual person (not just good for cuddling!) underneath the issues and insecurities she may have.
Thanks for the update! Glad to hear things are going well.