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Old 03-12-2012, 12:50 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Originally Posted by Lariel View Post
You assume I haven't tried all of these things before, never mind continuing to do them now, with little result. Just like they do. You assume that obviously I can't have done these things because I'm still depressed, and if I did then I'd be fine. Please don't assume these things, because when you are wrong it is quite insulting - it's always better to ask instead.
Umm... nope! You sure are incorrect in your assumption that I was assuming anything about you. Seriously, I wasn't. How could I? I don't know you! Nothing was "obvious" to me. But I'm not insulted by your assumption because other people don't have the power to make me feel insulted. Why should you care about me anyway, and feel insulted? I'm nobody important to you.

Perhaps it seemed, at face value, as if the things I wrote were so very much like other things you'd heard before that you dismissed my input as useless and assumed that I was making assumptions about you. Sure, you could be doing all those things, and so could I. But you're not the only person that might benefit from input on this thread. And nobody's got a magic wand, unfortunately. All the shit we need to do to take care of ourselves is the same shit we've all heard before.

You asked for "help" and "insight." My posts were just my insights from where I sit and I made no assumptions about you. My first paragraph expressed what your situation seemed like to me, but it was not an assumption and anything I could see could also be totally wrong.

When I said "do some of those things your therapists have suggested, heh-heh," couldn't you tell the "heh-heh" was a friendly laugh? I wasn't really telling you what to do, I was injecting some humor. I like to find humor in things because, as I see it, the key to "enlightenment" is keeping things light.

You make a statement like "I don't know how to bring my best self to relationships," I answer it with what I know to be ways to do that, and you say I'm making assumptions about you because you're already doing that. Well, fuck me, I guess I'm an idiot for sharing what works for me. How about acknowledging yourself for doing those things and saying to me "You're bang-on. I guess I'm on the right track." Instead of getting insulted. Ugh.
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