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Old 03-10-2012, 07:45 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Originally Posted by SuddenlyStoneElf View Post
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
If he's agreed to "work with you through this," then what's his problem with reading up on poly and learning what others have done to succeed and get over the bumps in the road?
Because he's worried about not implementing what he reads correctly, and he's worried that everyone else's opinions and experiences will end up overruling his own. He'd rather figure it out for himself, which means... no shortcuts, no help, no outside inspiration.
Well, I think that most books about polyamory don't preach to anyone about how to go about it. Most just give options and examples and encourage the reader figure out for themselves how to make polyamory work in their own lives. The book I suggested, Opening Up, is pretty much a collection of others' experiences with some suggestions on how to make things work, stuff to watch out for, resources, and a bunch of checklists (the author has a website:

There are so many ways to live polyamorously, no one can really say "Here's how you should do it."
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

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