I'm back. Sort of.
It was a really great trip. I was late (I'm genetically incapable of arriving anywhere on time). My asthma was really bad in the car on the way to pick up First BF. I let myself have a coffee because I knew we'd be on the road all day. I told him I was bringing EVERYthing because it was my car; and I forgot my nice new pants that I really wanted to have. I was worried about being in the car so much, because I my body has deteriorated some since I used to do big road trips. We travel well together. I was pleased. Our iPods have different music but we managed to find things that made both of us happy.
Arrived late and went out exploring a little bit. Had lovely sexy time. His wake/sleep cycle is so different than mine, and I'm generally half-unconscious by the time he's even interested. Challenging.
Second day, Current BF called and we all talked a bit. Current BF told me he had called First BF to wish him happy birthday. First BF didn't mention it. But Current BF was good & plastered and trying to convince First BF to come to a dinner party his mom is having. He's got other plans that day. It was very nice for me, because it touched on old times when the three of us spent lovely time together. I'm still nervous about the three of us, just because we haven't all been in a room together since we became a vee. Current BF is like magick glue that makes things like that okay. I adore that about him. He's so inclusive in all his life.
Somewhat nervous about First BF, as he's 'leaked' some things that make me wonder and worry if he's as okay with it as he seems. I worry that he's in it because it's what's available, rather than what he really wants. On the other hand, I know he was sort of unhappy when we were exclusive, and as an introvert, he feels he can't give all that a girl wants/needs/deserves, and so he's happy that I can get some of what I need from not-him. And I worry because he's not extremely talkative about it all. He has insight, he's just ... I don't know. Perhaps that's my hook. *sigh*
I think they move glacially and I move like lightening. It's good for me, it really is, to slow down, and know that everything's okay and I can just rest and bask in their love and goodwill.
I do feel utterly, hopelessly, deliciously loved and fulfilled. I'm the luckiest girl in my world. <3
and I have shin splints from hiking way more than my body can handle. Off to epsom salts! I'm so loving vacation. I'm at home on Friday and not at work (because I'm going on mini road trip to visit my parents the rest of the weekend).