Originally Posted by bock
However, we decided that in the future we should definitely get to know anyone before we really get involved.
Isn't it funny how poly dating is so very much like mono dating?
One should find out if the other person is on the rebound from a recent breakup (rebound relationships usually aren't successful). One should find out how the other treats family on a regular basis before getting seriously involved. Find out how the other treats wait staff and store personnel. And so on.
Even if the relationship begins by dating, it's always useful to proceed slowly--meaning not spending half of each week from the outset with the other person. See them once a week for a while to learn about them and gauge if it's a good match. That sort of thing.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.