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Old 03-03-2012, 08:37 AM
Bells Bells is offline
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 13
Default Everything and everyone is just moving to fast and I don't know how to slow it down

So this is my first time having a serious, open from the very beginning, relationship. There is absolutely nothing 'wrong' in my relationships, a little jealousy here and there but more of a passing thought than an actual problem. However, I just feel things are moving way to fast.

My boyfriend met and started seeing his other girlfriend (who is only casually seeing other people) less than a month after we got together. I like her, we get along, and I still get enough attention from him as I want/need, as I said before there is nothing 'wrong'. It has been only a couple months since then and while I do not want them to stop seeing each other I want to ask him to slow the relationship down. I don't feel like we ever got fully comfortable as a couple before adding in another person and with us talking a lot lately about future plans I want to make sure I have a solid foundation with him.

On the other hand I am doing the exact same thing as him. When we met I had just started dating someone and was casually seeing someone else. The guy I was dating got freaked out by the open thing and backed off for a while but is now back in my life (but has no interest and being with anyone other than me). So I have my two boyfriends and I casually see other people. I don't know what I would do if he asked me to slow things down with my other partner like I want to ask him to do. It is just happening to quickly.

I feel like I am drowning in people talking about how they feel about me, how they see their future with me in it. I have had to start color coding my calendar to keep straight when I am seeing who. I wanted to gently ease into this after a previous relationship opening up and going south shortly after but that just isn't happening.

I should just be happy with my good fortune meeting these great people but I just feel like the timing is all off and it is stressing me out. All of these brand new relationships all at once. Tonight I was seriously considering just putting an end to the whole open relationship thing, saying it is just more than I can handle. But I care about everyone involved and there isn't a single person I want to see leave my life.

How do I slow things down without sounding like I am trying to end things between anyone? Is it even possible to form two new relationships at the same time?
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