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Old 02-28-2012, 01:18 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pretzels View Post
Tell her you want to meet her other (if you do), or her parents (if you do), etc. The way she responds to that may tell you all you need to know about whether there's a looming expiration date on your relationship.
I don't think it is necessarily true that a relationship cannot be successful if one is not integrated into all areas of a lover's life. She may view her relationship with the OP as an oasis/refuge/escape from the rest of her life, or is simply the type of person who compartmentalizes different friends and relationships and keeps them manageable that way. Some people don't want everyone they know to all meld together in their lives, they like them separate. Certainly, how satisfying this can be for the OP will depend on how involved he wants to be in the rest of her life.

Yami08, do you clearly know what you want? Has she met your friends and family? Would you be open to having another relationship yourself? You stated earlier that you were dating others when you started seeing her, and went out to "have a blast" with your friends, but since feelings of love came up, you don't do that anymore, have less confidence, as you've have been very focused on her. I think you've made her the center of your world, and you would benefit from dating others again.
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
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