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Old 02-27-2012, 06:40 PM
AutumnalTone AutumnalTone is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Kansas City Metro
Posts: 2,188
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Megziebaby216 View Post
... he calls me controlling and says i shouldnt have a say where it doesnt involve me....

It very much does involve you. Any child he fathers places a legal and financial obligation on him that will affect you quite a bit. It will affect your scheduling and household budget.

I have to wonder why you're tolerating his behavior. He already had unprotected sex with a previous partner and knocked her up--and he's talking about doing the same again? I say it's quite obvious that he doesn't really give a damn about you and simply wants to father a child with whomever he can talk into it. Unprotected sex that puts you at risk AND plans for a child that will greatly affect your life and which you don't want--and you're still hanging around?

Seriously, were my wife to tell me that she was planning to have a child with somebody else whether I wanted to deal with another child or not, I'd tell her she's free to do so, to have fun with that, and the divorce papers would be ready as soon as the attorney's office could provide them. I'm not going to be obligated to a child not my own without making the choice myself.

Boundaries are very good things to enforce.
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When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.

While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.
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