Originally Posted by schismist
Look, I'm not pressuring myself to get my dick wet. The last time was incredibly enjoyable, and I do feel a palpable connection with this woman. I just focused on pleasing her, and I can do that a lot better without my dick. Afterwards we had amazing snuggles.
I honestly have no problem with the situation other than the awkwardness of her sucking my limp dick. I really think I just need to have one success and then whatever barrier is in my brain will be gone forever.
Well it seems an odd contradiction between wanting to build a relationship and referring to this sex you want to use to help build your relationships as not just being about getting your dick wet. If you feel awkward getting your dick sucked when you aren't sure you're going to be able to respond, then snuggle and make out until you are relaxed enough for it to start responding and then go from there. I do suggest following all the sage advice posted before that you take it a bit slower if a relationship is what you want to really be creating.
I don't think at all that having one success will banish what's going on in your brain. Maybe it would for this one relationship, but I think it's pretty likely to occur again in the future if you jump in dick first so to speak. I guess I know why I avoid answering OKC sex based questions, I prefer each relationship take a natural progression that makes sense for the individuals involved. I'd hate for a date to assume we should be fucking/saying I love you/having orgies by date X just because I say that's what I expect in my profile.