I definitely don't like the use of hierarchies to describe us, just thought I'd give some perspective. She has also thrown out those titles here and there, but I haven't made it clear that it bothers me...and it does sometimes.
bookbug - I would definitely love to be a co-primary. It would seem that the way we are building this relationship, it is leading to that but I won't assume. Perhaps I am giving her too much of the decision power, not stating my wants and needs. This is something I am currently working on.
redpepper - I somewhat agree with you, but I also don't want to shower her with this love perhaps not wanting to smother her. She has on occasion pulled away when she feels she is getting too close to me. Her way of balancing the Vee I'd assume. the last thing I want is to rock the boat...but sometimes my feelings for her are too strong, and I am finding it increasingly difficult to manage.