Originally Posted by Claviger
I'm in a poly relationship with my wife of 16 years. I'm basically mono, free to date but not terribly interested, whereas she has a steady girlfriend...
I also feel the time management element. It's not that four hours a week is a ton of time, but I would love to have two two-hour blocs of time with my wife every week where there are no distractions and we're completely focused on each other.
Well, I hope that your wife is also dating you as well as her gf! It seems that that is what married couples often forget to do when one or both of them has additional partners - date each other.
It doesn't matter if a relationship is poly or mono, if all the time spent together for a married couple is about housework, bills, and family stuff without regular, romantic, sexy times, the relationship will eventually feel stale and lackluster. We've seen that this gets magnified when a marriage (or any relationship where people cohabit) is opened up, because the new gf or bf doesn't have all those shared responsibilities that a partner or spouse has, so they get all the fun and the spouse gets all the chores. Quality time with your partner is very important. Make sure you negotiate for the time you need with your wife, schedule regular date nights every week, and romance her!