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Old 02-24-2012, 06:59 AM
Red0824 Red0824 is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2012
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Hey guys, sorry I didn't get back sooner. We had the baby on the 10th and things have been crazy. I read all of your replies, and thank you so much for the advice, it's certainly helped me try and keep my head together. Anyway, Updates, hubby and I are separating and working towards a divorce. Things escalated in such a way that this is the only option we have. The past caught up to us and the present being as it is didn't help either. It will be a full 2 weeks Friday and during those 2 weeks I, have been up during the night with baby, he has been working a ton and gf is still very much in the picture. I asked him to take a break for us and baby and he wouldnt, apparently the gf is very important to him. He has even spent the night at her house twice since we've been home with the baby. Luckily I have my mom in town and she has been a tremendous help! So the other night he went out drinking after a long day at work, I tried to make it a date night since I can have more fun, but he thought it would be weird and told me gf was there. I exploded, we got into this huge fight that's been going on for days and finally settled on separation on his part, divorce on mine. I just couldn't handle it anymore, he chose her and poly over me and baby. At least that's the way I see it. We haven't been the happiest since I got pregnant, but that was the icing on the cake. One of the major problems is, he can't move out just yet, I'll need two roommates to help with the house so in the mean time we still sleep in the same bed, and my jealousy and guilt of ruining the marriage grows more and more because i still see him almost every day. I'm constantly reminded by him that this was my fault. If I had just been cool and honest about not being comfortable with poly, none of this would have happened. Now the question is, how can I keep my sanity while he is still here? I'm so much better when he isn't around. Not to mention, I'm super horny, and we have amazing sex , but it'll be another 4 weeks till I can do anything and I'd really like to have goodbye sex lol. We haven't been fighting for the past 2 or 3 days so when I'm not crazy, things are calmer. We still love each other and hate the situation, but it is what it is. It's harder because he has her to go to and I'm alone, taking care of a newborn. How can I begin the process of finding myself while he is still here? Now I'm really lost..... But things are crystal clear.
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