Originally Posted by nycindie
It's simply that some people don't like the idea of hierarchies in multiple relationships, and some people do. For some, a hierarchy works really well, and for others, it rankles.
No worries nycindie, I'm totally with you on that. Whatever works for some, works and that's cool. And some people like certain terminology, and that's cool too. I'm in no way trying to disparage non-hierarchical models, or the terminologies that people use to communicate with others. It's all good.
The point I'm trying to make is that regardless of the label, be it "primary" or "co-partner" or whatever, the people are still people and jerks will still be jerks, no matter what set of labels have been used. So the idea that changing labels like "central" vice "primary" will somehow cause some partners to be less jerky than they would be anyways, seems to me a little naive.
The important part of the equation in whether one is treated well by their partners is the people involved...not what they're called, or the set of vocabulary being used.