It sounds to me as if you're monagamous in a relationship with a poly man. I say this because if you were truly polyamarous your self; you would not feel like your connection with your boyfriend needed to be severed in order for you to find another relationship.
I know that you want your relationship with him to workout the way that you want, but that may just not be in the cards. Taking a break is almost as hard as breaking up completely. All I can do is offer you hugs. *hugs*