Thanks for starting this thread. I came to this theory for myself about six months ago and have been expressing it on here since then. It seems to resonated for most poly people and it seems to explain why there are personal descriptions of poly for those engaged in it.
There seems to be a couple of different categories of poly.
- Identifying as poly since birth. Monogamy is not an option and this will always be. At some point there might be a shift in focus and monogamy is what is practices as lifestyle choice, but the person still considers themselves poly.
- Choosing poly as a way of swinging/being "open" with their spouse or out on their own or as a way to date many people and stay open and honest in their communication about who they are sleeping with and spending time with. Poly is a lifestyle choice that has comfortable values of honesty and consent until "the one" comes along. Can sometimes be linked to filling bisexual needs while keeping a primary partner.
Please feel free to add to this list. Its in no way meant to be exclusive.
For me? I am the first on this list. Cheated, had many short and long term relationships, identified as a lesbian for years, tried it all out and nothing seemed to fit until I identified as pansexual and polyamorous. Ahhhh, its all good now.
I think at some point I can see myself taking a monogamous lifestyle or at least a primary relationship as I get older and less able to concentrate, balance, encompass and "take care of" three to four relationships. I am not sure how I will manage more than one and I will likely be fine directing my energy to other areas of life at that time and live monogamously. Who knows; no one can predict the future.