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Old 02-13-2012, 06:26 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Originally Posted by ThatGirlInGray View Post
It seems to me like she's assuming that the opposite of "inclusion" is "exclusion", but though that's how the English language works that's not an accurate description of how relationships work. There's a LOT of gray area in between "everyone all together" and "everyone must stay separate" that she's either unaware of or choosing to ignore. Like I'm choosing to ignore her "we are already connected energetically as souls". Just because I'm connected to someone as a fellow human being, it doesn't automatically follow that I want to spend time with them!
"Inclusion" vs. "separation" seems to be the opposites here. Rather than "inclusion" vs. "exclusion." "Invitation" vs. "bringing in" is the other part of this.

I find it interesting that people chose the path of attempting to control situations by attempting to "bring in" partners and by choosing to even think about "inclusion" or "separation." Why not just let it go and see where everyone fits. To me neither "inclusion" or "separation" is where my mind goes when I start a relationship. One is stiffing to me (like being co-dependent would be) and the other too distant and uninvolved. I just wouldn't feel comfortable with either. At the very least I would want to know what each term meant to the people involved. If they were to use such phrases as, "you are "invited" to be as involved with us as seems healthy for you. We would like you to be as included as much as you want or as separate as much as you want" then I might be able to breath. I would also offer similar phrases to them in return.

She was making a statement about how we are all connected so isn't "bringing in" a valid term that fits? Others seemed to think that all of this is semantics. "Invitation" is the same as "bringing in." I disagree. One makes me feel as if I have a choice and I am welcome to choose for what is going to work and be healthy for me, the other makes me feel as if I have been chosen and I will be folded into whatever is expected of me regardless of who I am and whether or not I am a good fit.
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Last edited by redpepper; 02-13-2012 at 06:42 AM.
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