Originally Posted by ThatGirlInGray
I'd be REALLY careful about opening the door to her helping with the baby. Friends and family can help cook, clean, maybe even change a diaper or two, but that's new parent/child bonding time. If you are already dealing with issues regarding her presence in your life I personally wouldn't be willing to have her around WHILE I'm getting used to motherhood and getting to know my new child. I didn't even care for having my mother-in-law around! This is your child as much as his and you have EVERY right to say who is or is not welcome around you and the baby in the first few months, at least.
Fair enough. The only poly situation (two couple quad) I knew that went through this was already well-established by the time the one woman got pregnant. They've done a lot of group parenting even post-dissolution. However, I can see your point in making a relative newcomer such a fixture in your life during a time of great upheaval.