I`m continually blown away, by the amount of people who want to start poly relationships, while a major life change is underway. Poly takes everything you have, and then some. Trying to give any poly relationship the chance it deserves while working 60 hour weeks, and having a new baby, just doesn`t make sense. Sounds more like escapism to me.
Whatever else you have going on, that has you freaking out,..I don`t think that is abnormal. In fact, most mono partners freak out. How you HANDLE the feelings is the important part.
So instead of chastising yourself, and making the same mistake over and over again, how about you allow yourself to the feelings, but learn to channel it in a respectful manner ? Learn to just say .." I am scared." and go from there.
So the advice is to stop hating yourself for feelings, but change your reaction. Don`t make 'split-up' decisions while you are under a stressful, new time in your relationship. (pregnancy and new family member coming to the world.) Also, he could pay attention to you and the baby, and leave his dating on a doorstep for awhile.
Last edited by SourGirl; 02-08-2012 at 07:08 PM.