I agree with you that ideally, R and I would be able to communicate... but unfortunately, she has a habit of treating me so badly, calling me derogatory names, making a scene in front of other people, that I chose not to talk with her. It is better for little girl's sake that she doesn't see her mother freaking out!!!! On the oen occassion where she has seen her mother yell at me, she's been very very upset afterwards. There's no reason to put her through that. And my boyfriend is able to communicate with her enough that the two of them are able to talk about whatever they need to talk about to share information about little girl.