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Old 02-06-2012, 01:21 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,448

I remembered something today that's relevant to this conversation.

I've always considered myself non-heterosexual, even when I had never dated any women (I'm a woman, just to clarify).

For years, I questioned whether I was really "bi" because I had never had the experience of seeing an attractive woman and thinking "I want to have sex with her." But then one day I realized, I had also never had that thought about a man. That was when it all "clicked" for me. I have never been sexually attracted to anyone whose personality I didn't know. Sure, I have found many people to be generally "attractive" but that's not the same as wanting them sexually. I wasn't sexually attracted to male strangers any more than I was attracted to female strangers, and neither any more than I was attracted to androgynous strangers.

This was a great moment for me. Finally I realized that I didn't have to fantasize about having sex with women in order to be non-heterosexual, since I didn't fantasize about men either. I just have a low sex drive and my focus is elsewhere. For me, sex is just another form of intimacy, something that is nice to share with a partner, but if something were to happen that made sex impossible, it wouldn't end (for me) the relationship.
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.

Last edited by SchrodingersCat; 02-06-2012 at 01:26 AM.
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