Things have improved slightly, although I'm finding the journey difficult still. He understands the boundaries I have expressed. Some of them he is in complete agreement with. Others are still up in the air. He recently expressed that he felt bad for me because I hadn't asked for any of this. I responded that when I"m in a calm, rational state of mind, I understand that where we are is a consequence of the troubles we had / have. All we can do is move forward and act positively in these circumstances.
Today I felt sad, last night we had a disagreement about the way I act when he makes a mistake. I tried to explain that I have a lot of childhood conditioning that I'm sorting out with my therapist, and I sarcastically apologized that I'd made the mistake of getting angry, for the 1 millionth time. I dunno; this journey of coming to terms with being in a triad is sooooo hard on some days. I have to cry, I have to let the anger out safely, and then all I can really do is pick myself up and keep plodding forward. :| <--- That's my "soldier-on" face