Originally Posted by gemms
We kinda went into this not knowing what we were. She calls me his gf and her best friend but she definitely tries to control my relationship with her husband. It's always about her and therefore mine and his frustrations. He is very non confertational and i am about to blow...I don't want to because I love him so dearly I couldn't stand losing him over this. I just want him to be treated right with tje respect be deserves. Oh my ... I'm sounding crazy aren't I?
You're not crazy. You're in love with someone, you're seeing him treated like a houseplant and you don't see a way to fix the situation.
I dated a guy who was married to a woman who sounds a lot like your boyfriend's wife. If the woman in your scenario is really as self-centered as she sounds, you've got a very tough road ahead. I'm sorry. Try to get it so the three of you can sit down and have a very open, non-confrontational discussion using a lot of "I" statements - "I feel (whatever) when you decide when and how my boyfriend and I can interact."
Good luck. You're going to need it.