Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG
I honestly don't think I can explain them to any degree of satisfaction. But that is not my intent in this. All I can say is that the differing ideas of what insecurity and comittment are seem to be key components of how we look at the different aproaches to loving. Some are these are based on social or peer conditioning while others are purely a product of wiring.
I'm not sure how you can say that they are key components to how you're viewing things yet be unable to define exactly what they are. It would seem to me that this is a pretty important cognitive dissonance that could create much misunderstanding.
For me, when I see people saying that poly people have differing ideas around commitment, that usually means that those people are misunderstanding what it means to be poly. These people are tending to blend the idea of commitment with the idea of exclusivity when they are two very different things. The same goes for insecurity. Insecurity is insecurity, regardless of whether it's in a poly or mono context. The mechanisms that drive insecurity are the same, regardless of the label put on them.
I find that when there's lack of clarity around these ideas, misunderstandings and assumptions start to take over in ways that continue to create inaccurate perceptions and prejudices around poly identified people.
I'm taking this piece of the discussion to another thread.