Originally Posted by newguy
I'm not sure what to think about your post...at first, you say that I'm not shit because of how I feel and then you say give her what she wants...
First off - your not shit because of how you feel, but neither is she for how she feels.
Second - I never said give her what she wants, but that doesn't mean the discussion has to be off the table.
I don't understand the sex is OK as long as there is no relationship thing. To me that screams of being used and tossed aside. I don't see this working the way either of you are approaching the whole situation. The way I read this is that you were kind of blind sided by the whole thing and you guys haven't spent a lot of time hashing out all the ramifications of what it all means or how it could all work (some couples take years to do this). What I have seen is that starting down this path tends to bring all the so called little issues with your current relationship to the surface and magnify them. There have been some absolutely catastrophic disasters that have been posted about here.
Personally, I think you guys need much more time discussing everything and reading about others experiences before doing anything new. Do some tag searches on foundations, lessons, & communication. I know there are others that would be good, but can't think of them.