I told Beloved about a week ago that I wanted to not talk to her for a while. So while I texted her once, we haven't spoken. It's weird because we've talked at least once every day for 12 years. I want to have real conversations with her again and that's not happening right now. I don't know if she understands why - I don't think I explained it well.
I am going to change Beloved's moniker. I will always love her but she is no longer my beloved nor am I hers. I will call her Beaker instead.