When i meet my husband I told him as his friend I was poly. I loaned him books, read him MANY of my postings on it and he knew before marriage i partispated in Poly support groups/dinners. He also knew i don't do one night stands , hooks ups, or casual sex well at all.
All during our dating, and eventual marriage , Never did i ever pretend to be mono, or would be. But in his head he thought marriage meant I would change who i was.
After marriage I still kept my blog and shared videos, articles, videos, and went to my support meetings. I never dated anyone during our marriage. i just hadn't met anyone I bonded with. However when I told him of one gent who was already partners with 2 women i adored, I exspressed interest to see if we clicked deeper...he accused me of cheating.
I never once cheated, on any level. I never pretended to be something i was not. We are seperated now. Live apart..ironically it was him whom cheated on me several times. LONG before the discussion of the other gent was brought up.
Needless to say I wont regret it. I won't be mono ever again. Ive tried it. Was always faithful, loyal, loving gf. Everyone of them cheated and lied and left. I really have no interest in dating anyone mono/or poly who doesn't have the ability to love me for me.