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Old 01-25-2012, 03:25 AM
TriQuad TriQuad is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Missouri, near Saint Louis
Posts: 1
Default friendly ear here.....

[SIZE="2"]Thank you for the post tactical. I read the entire post and really enjoyed it. As entredeux stated, you all sound amazing and seem like a wonderful family. The love and joy in your family is great.

In reading, we can emotionally feel the current stress involved. Going through growing pains, individually and collectively is hard. Sorry, that you are going through it. Moving is a big change and you can only feel like "Who Moved My Cheese?" especially in an environment that is totally unlike what you are accustom and is not supportive of your family dynamic.
(Hope this does not read as elementary)
Few questions - just to think about that came to mind:
Are you doing the things you formally did with/within your family?
Did you formerly meditate together, your Buddhism, (or pray) in the past and no longer have that scheduled for the family or individually? Do yoga or walk in the park?
-When is the last time you and Liz have gone to the orchestra or opera together?
-Even though David is not eating dinner with the family, are all of the rest of you eating together anyway?
Have you created any new family rituals?

The song came to mind called "Come Back to the Middle". Which to me means to come back to where you started. That does not necessarily mean physical location however, but coming back to your connection.

IMHO, sometimes distance can makes the heart grow fonder. It can give you time to think, miss your mate(s) (emotionally and sexually) and you are usually very happy to see each other when you reconnect. If living in two cities for a while works for you all, why not?

If you all can, stop and remember why you feel in love in the first place (write them down if you haven't done so already). Yes, things are different now, (growth/growing pains?) but your love for one another and the commitment to your family is the same.
Please, don't let what is going on 'outside' of your family and with other people get you down (others peoples looks, thoughts, remarks, perspectives). Create your own "community". Find the people and places where "we" hang out and that can support you if you can.

If you can, keep us posted on how things work out.

Personally, wishing you all well and all the very best.
~TQ
p.s. Hope to learn more from you as you share your wealth of experience and information.
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