He says I have to accept him the way he is, or else we can't be together....
:/ His actions aren't up for debate, basically. If I say anything about it, he says I'm not letting him be his own person, and I'm trying to change him. That I'm not letting him be polyamorous.
I can't say anything about the people he picks to be his lovers, and I can't ask him not to sleep around. It seems like he's already made plans. Because he said he knew how the weekend was going to go.
I just... I don't know what to do.
People tell me that I shouldn't be the only one sacrificing in this relationship, but at the same time, aren't I denying him who he feels he is if I don't let him do "whatever the hell he wants"?
Yes. I have spoken to him. This was the second time. And he basically said, this is what he was doing. And that's it. :/ I have no say in his life, or what he's doing... He just does it, and I have to deal with or. Or not deal with it.
He says I "knew what I was getting into" back when we met. Yes. He told me he was poly. But I mean... People have such vast definitions of what it means to be polyamorous. His seems to include taking lovers (and only telling me about them being together after they have been intimate. Apparently planning and meeting up before that doesn't mean a thing unless sexual acts happen.) and one night stands/threesomes/orgies/I don't even know what he has planned.
And... I just don't know. I have no say in what he does. He'd pick fucking multiple women over having a relationship with me any day. I think simply over the principle that I would be "making him choose".
Last edited by Mookitten; 01-22-2012 at 04:53 AM.