Talk Talk Talk
Hey nycindie, thanks for that. Don't mean to make it sound like I'm not into talking it out, it's just hard work/heavy lifting right now. Yes, it bothers me for sure - was hoping to find someone who'd say, "That totally happened with us..." There are no magic answers though, poly is a smallish community, so finding large average of people who've been through this might be tough, I guess. Altho mags seems to think that it's pretty standard, so maybe I'm wrong about that one.