Originally Posted by sealace
1. Married poly man-amazing chemistry, lots of fun together. Problem: I fell madly in love with him. But regardless of my feelings and the amazing connection we have, and the great times together, when we are apart the messages I get from him are detached and non-emotional. I find it frustrating and strange that he can be so warm and close when we're together and then just totally detach when we're not. Men, can you give me some insights here? Or women, for that matter. The last straw for me was over the holidays when I only got two measly messages from him, both sort of generic. I'm not good at that type of relationship! So I wrote him a letter saying as much, and he responded by saying I should trust my instincts if it's still not working for me after we had a big talk a month ago, and that maybe we can at least be friends. So sad and frustrated with this.
I just got dumped by someone that is like this. I asked for more contact as I was losing my connection between dates (once a month for three years) and he was not interested in more. By the time I saw him I was distant and disconnected. By the end of our time together I was filled with connection again. It was a roller coaster that never ended for me. I would think long and hard on how much you are different in terms of how you have relationships and communicate and if you are willing to see him once and awhile for a nice time and then not for a time then go for it. Don't do what I did though. Don't wait until it gets further and further apart from seeing him and ends. If its done its done and if you can't do it then there is nothing wrong about that. It might be the best for you in the end as you can find people who do worl