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Old 01-16-2012, 11:55 PM
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Derbylicious Derbylicious is offline
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Victoria BC
Posts: 1,603

For the past couple of days I've been thinking about why things go sour so quickly when people break up. I have a theory that we tend to store things up in our memories that bother us about the person who we were in a relationship with that bother us. Now these things don't seem to be important enough to talk about at the time because they really are just little things. It's easy to let things slide because all the good things in the relationship outweigh the things that aren't so good. Never the less those things that we don't agree with or that have caused us to feel hurt or misunderstood are still there.

So when people break up it seems like the statement of the breakup is like breaking the dam holding back all that pent up negativity. So breakups end up being so much more hurtful than they have to be. Somewhere and sometime not all that long ago you loved each other so why go out of your way to do and say things that are purposely hurtful?

I guess this means I should really talk about things that bother me when they bother me, even if they are only little things. I don't want to one day end up in the position of lashing out after a breakup. I love my partners and more than that I like and respect them as the people they are. I don't want to have pent up stuff inside that's just itching to get out. (And no, there's nothing specific on my mind right now. This is just a thought that will hopefully lead to more self awareness).
Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok it's not the end.
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